Welcome to Day 20 of the 30 Days of Encouragement series. This series encourages you to trust the process, extend grace to yourself as you step into the unknown, and keep going even when it is difficult. 

Today’s post is about the space between beginning of the path and reaching the destination, aka the wait.

And So It Begins…

Starting on a new adventure is exciting! All the best feels are there, and motivation is high. It is nice to be so proud of yourself for taking the leap, step, or completely changing it all up in your life. Really taking the risk you have been wanting to take. This could be as approaching the person you have had your eye on in the coffee shop or moving cities or countries. While one seems more significant, the courage involved is the same for the people doing them. It is equal parts scary, exciting, exhilarating, and hopeful. The reality of the initial step being the easy part does not dawn on you until a bit later. The real courage kicks in after taking your action. When the results are not forthcoming or not what you were hoping for.

The Waiting Game

Anyone who has decided to change their eating habits knows that initially, some weight falls off quickly, and then you hit a plateau. You are doing all the “right” things, keeping your goal in sight, and pushing through, yet nothing. Likewise, this occurrence applies to desires and goals in other areas – career, finances, relationships, emotions, and mentalities. You are meeting your financial goals and saving money, then BOOM!, an unexpected expense. You have grown leaps and bounds in managing the anxiety you experience, then one night, you cannot stop crying without any clue as to why. These realities, among others, are part and parcel of the waiting period. Not being aware or blind to the icky feeling bits as part of the path can derail you from your dreams, desires, and goals.

No Man’s Land

During the wait, you will encounter no man’s land. This is the space between the action and the desired result. Questions, doubts, and uncertainties will arise in this land. Circumstances will appear the same, maybe even worse. Yet you know changes have taken place inside you. You are seeing things from a new perspective, you are more peaceful than you are anxious, and you are continuing forward when you would have quit in the past. That makes questions, doubts, and uncertainties all the more potent. How does one navigate this no man’s land? I am glad you asked because here are three small, simple tips that I use that help me.

• Remember your why.  When you decide on an action, there is a why behind it. Know that why and remember it when you are struggling. The why can evolve as the path continues, and new desires get added to the list as you gain knowledge. Remembering the why from the beginning will help you when you hit the wall – which will happen. We each get fatigued and/or overwhelmed, and recalling the why helps lessen that. 
• Listen to what your inner self is telling you.  If you find the fatigue and doldrums popping up more often than not, that may be a sign that you must listen to what you are being told. It is easy to get caught up in an outcome so much that we drive ourselves too hard to achieve it. Becoming militant about it is not helpful for some. I fall into that category. When I find that I have switched to a militant mentality, I know I have crossed into unhealthy territory. Truly listening to my inner self, which requires a certain level of honesty, and doing what I feel inclined to do does the trick. Sometimes it is to rest, while other times, I sense I need to get up and clean or organize an area of the house. It usually does the trick too!
• It is only a matter of time.  As frustrating as it is to hear when you are in the middle of the wait, it is true nonetheless. It is only a matter of time. Sometimes there is stagnation, delays, and recalibrations. However, you are still moving forward despite it all. Which means you are closer to the outcome than the starting position. It also means there has been growth, whether you readily recognize it or not. Celebrate how far you have come and how well you have applied yourself. Shake off the rest.

Until Next Time,

Rah