Welcome to Day 15 of 30 Days of Encouragement – Ebb and Flow! This series encourages you to trust the process, extend grace to yourself as you step into the unknown, and keep going even when it is difficult. Today, we will touch on the ebb and flow of feelings and how we can be proactive regarding heavier ones.

Tides Rolling In

Feelings can be quite the rollercoaster, can’t they? Given the circumstance, feelings can change in as little as a moment. A person can be up one day and down the next. I felt fantastic and upbeat yesterday morning, then this morning, I felt like doomsday.  Things will never change. How long will this last? What ARE you doing?  Elvira has been quite vocal over the last 12 hours. I also had a heaping dose of condemnation to spice things up. I had to remind myself that like feelings I enjoy have an ebb and flow, the feelings I do not care for do the same. The length of the ebb and flow is something I am more in control of than I initially thought.  

Riptide

What I decide to do when the heavier feelings present themselves is the determining factor in how long I have to deal with them. When I lean into them, I get sucked into a riptide and cannot see which way is up or down. I no longer control how long they will last or when they will end. I have ceded all power and control over them. It is never a pleasant experience. However, they dissipate more quickly when I decide not to lean into them.   

Notice that there is a decision to be made, and you are the only one who can make it. It will be easier to decide not to lean in some days, and other days will not be so easy. That is okay. 

Riding The Wave

As there is a decision involved as to whether or not the waves of your emotions suck you under or you ride them out, allow me to share some small, simple tips I do to avoid the riptide.

• I remind myself that feelings ebb and flow.  As I stated above, I recognize that the feelings I do not like will go out just as they have come in and not get sucked into them.  
• I go into robot mode and follow through on pre-made decisions even when I do not feel like it.  Frankly, I force myself to do what I had planned on doing even though I do not feel like it. Last night, I decided when I woke up today, I would exercise with some light calisthenics and then go for an early morning walk. This morning when I woke up, I did precisely those things. Did I want to? Not. At. All. I wanted to mope and wallow in self-pity. I did not, and now I am being productive by accomplishing what I have set out to do today. These feelings are SO much better than moping and self-pity.
• I remind myself how far I have come and take the win.  I tend to think that I should not ever deal with negative emotions. Due to that, guilt and condemnation are part and parcel of my negative emotions. That mindset is not valid, and it is unrealistic. It is also ridiculous. I remind myself of that and point out the difference between where I was and now. Even three months ago, I would have consistently chosen to wallow over pushing back. I will take that win.

Remember, some days you will win, some you won’t, and that is okay. I hope these tips will help put more marks in the win column.

Until Next Time,

Sarah